20 January, 2021

To The Invisible Prince Of A Vanishing Kingdom

'Pardon us for wondering if you really care or are just trapped in a job that you’ve been told is a historical duty you must fulfil'

Illustration by Saahil
To The Invisible Prince Of A Vanishing Kingdom

Dear Rahul,

Like you, I too have been on a leave of absence (for three weeks, and not indefinitely), and return to find this non-assignment waiting for me: where is Rahul Gandhi and when will he return? Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn, but unlike you I do have a job to do. So I dialled a few numbers in the Congress and I have to say that, when they are speaking off the record, Congressmen have the best sense of humour in the entire political class. The minute I ask where you are, the self-deprecating jokes begin. On the record, conversely, they are the biggest bores: they have no choice but to defend you and pretend to have insights when, frankly, you’ve left them all clueless.

Let’s face it Rahul, every now and then, the nation still wants to know where the hell you are, whether you are actually sulking, whether you are out to get rid of the old guard of the Congress, whether you are emotionally disturbed or psychologically battered, whether you are about to become Congress president, and whether the only problem you have...



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